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je suis la petite bete de person
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| Smoking :: The Final Fuck You |
[Tuesday
June 12th, 2007 ] |
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mood |
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 amused |
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music |
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Overkill - Men at Work |
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So I've quit smoking.
So far I'm feeling really good about it.
Yesterday I cleaned my ashtrays - they are now candle holders.
One was being particularly obtuse, wouldn't come clean, so I left it in the sink to soak.
I get back from a nice long walk this evening, decide to get the dishes done before bed.
I finish up all the dishes, then tackle this last ashtray.
I'm just scrubbing the last little bit of it, and somehow it breaks clean in two, slicing open my thumb.
Not a huge cut, but it was like the final little death keel, a send-off.
Funny thing is it's the same thumb that just healed from my fondue fork attack last week.
That is all.
xo
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| Thinking aloud. |
[Monday
May 14th, 2007 ] |
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mood |
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 contemplative |
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It's probably just because I'm growing up, but lately I've known alot of people either getting pregnant, or giving birth. (Including cats.)
The mister and I awoke this morning at about 4 o'clock to realize his preggo cat was giving birth, and the little mewling noises were not the usual kittens.
She had four (!!), we thought she'd have maybe two. They are so tiny and mewling, I can't wait for them to open their eyes and play with them. I might be taking one, if he agrees to it. (These are the sphynx cats.)
I found out about a month ago that one of my best friends here is pregnant. She's just into her second trimester now, and starting to get really excited about it. I'm happy for her, but cautious too. Then I remember my mom had me when she was a year younger than us, and it doesn't seem that odd.
One of the ladies I work with just went off on mat leave, she was due on the 7th, we haven't heard from her yet. She was huge when she left, I hope for her sake she's given birth already so that she can stand up without getting someone to help her out of her chair.
Another woman I work with told me about two weeks ago that she is finally pregnant. I was the first in the office she told. Her and her husband have been trying for years. She is so happy about it, she bounces around the office now, and I don't blame her, it's what she's wanted more than anything since she can remember. She will be an amazing mom.
It all just seems so odd to me. I'm more than happy for all these women, they are doing what they want with their lives, doing something huge, and amazing, and scary at the same time. I just can't help but feel completely outside it. I have no urge to have children, never have. I realize a large amount of women my age say this, but it doesn't change the fact. I'm too pessimistic, I think. I'm terrified the world won't be around by the time I'm 75. Maybe not even 60. I don't want to bring a child into a world that might not be around for it's full life. And while I completely understand and don't begrudge people who do, I couldn't justify having a child, when there are so many in the world who don't even have a shot at the life they were brought into, no water or access to medical care, or daily food.
I'm glad I live in a day and age where it's ok that I can make this choice, not to have children, and not have it impact my life in a negative manner. I will however, be the aunt to my friends child, the one who feeds them candy and then takes them home, and buys them the annoying gifts their parents won't. I'm shooting for 10 for their first rock concert.
Just wanted to get this all off my chest.
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| Laundry Faux-Pas? |
[Monday
April 30th, 2007 ] |
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mood |
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 curious |
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music |
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Queens of the Stone Age - Monsters in the Parasol |
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My apartment building has one washer, and one dryer for tenant use. (Not cheap, either.)
There are 18 units in the building, yet somehow I've never run into anyone down there who is either waiting for the washer to become available, or is getting their dry clothes from the dryer.
Normally Monday's are a laundry day, as I have the day off and figure there won't be as many people home during the day to do theirs. I had a ton of running around to get done once I got home from the boys this morning, so I didn't get a chance until this evening.
When I brought mine down to put in the washer, someone else had theirs in the dryer, with 47minutes to go. Works for me, the washer is 40 minutes, I'll wait an extra 10-15 and head down.
I spend 55 minutes doing dishes, checking possibly campsites for July, ect.
When I go downstairs, the dryer is still full. Hm, ok.
I decide to be polite, head back upstairs and wait another 10. By the time I'm back down there, it has been almost half an hour since their clothes were done.
So I took theirs out (all Ikea shirts and a few wife beaters...) and put them on top of a garbage bag I brought down on the dryer. I put mine in and started it.
Was this excesively rude of me? If it wasn't so late in the day I wouldn't care, but by the time my clothes are dry, and I've ironed the ones that need it, it's already 9:30.
What do you guys think?
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| ZING! |
[Friday
April 20th, 2007 ] |
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mood |
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accomplished |
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music |
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Nine Inch Nails - God Given |
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Mission Pierce Left Nipple (a.k.a Lucy) :: ACCOMPLISHED.
It hurt, but nowhere near as much as my lip did. (Which I no longer have.)
However, people who say the clamp is the worst part by far need to be punched in the balls - that's a load of shit.
The worst part is after the needle is in, and all your endorphins are wasted, and then the threaded barbell is pushed though behind it. I didn't flinch though, just a sort of loud, drawn out "Godamn sonovabitch!".
It looks huge and ungainly at the moment, (the jewellery that is) because in comparison my navel jewellery is tiny.
I can't wait for it to heal so that I can put a smaller piece in, including the smaller balls. Just looks better.
Once the marks he made to align it are completely washed off, I'll take pictures, and maybe post them here.
Does anyone really want to see my mutilated boob anyways? (Artfully mutilated, mind you..)
That's all I really have to talk about at the moment. It's too sunny outside to concentrate on much.
xo
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| Lucy's getting dressed up.. |
[Monday
April 16th, 2007 ] |
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mood |
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excited |
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So, tomorrow I will pay someone to piece my left nipple.
I'm excited.
Having thought about it for far too long, I've decided to go with the standard horizontal barbell. I contemplated diagonal, but the chances of it shifting or not being *just* the right angle are enough to make me lean back to horizontal.
I'm still deciding where, so for all my Toronto friends on here - where would you recommend? I've never been pierced in Toronto, and I'm not a fan of just walking in somewhere and asking to get it done.
I've heard good things about New Tribe, however they are closed until the 23rd for renos.
Lucky 13 and Planet Ink seem to get good reviews as well, but they are all from strangers.
Any thoughts?
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| fuckingshittyfuckfuck. |
[Tuesday
March 13th, 2007 ] |
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mood |
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 infuriated |
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I am currently in the 11th hour of one of those days where everything seems to go wrong, and you can't let any of them go.
Not the one guy who cut you off, the one milk you put in your coffee that soured it, or the one off-hand comment that wasn't an intentional dig, but you take personally regardless.
I feel like personally whipping the smug grins off the faces of anyone who has ever looked at me sideways right now.
I'm going to turn my phone off, so I don't tear a strip off someone who doesn't deserve it.
See, being proactive can actually improve your life. Maybe.
Anyone have any solutions that don't include violence to self/others, or screaming really loudly?
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| ps. |
[Sunday
March 11th, 2007 ] |
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mood |
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grumpy |
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I'm hungover and if I could smell myself I imagine it wouldn't be pleasant.
I have no hot water, and no one is answering the phone at my landlords.
So not impressed.
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| Of all things, my body is actually cutting me a break.. |
[Monday
February 19th, 2007 ] |
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mood |
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impressed |
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music |
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The Beatles - Eight Days A Week |
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So my body has decided that it's alright if I have a couple (or slightly more) drinks.
I think the last time I drank and didn't feel shitty in the morning was when I was about 16, maybe 17.
Is my liver getting a second wind? My brain found all the oxygen it needed somewhere else?
I'm not sure how, or why, but I'm really ok with this.
Went out for dinner with Aron last night, ended up going to the Velvet to play some pool and goof around. Also involved were many, many Stellas. We topped off the evening with some delectable red wine.
I mean I don't feel fantastic, but I'm not hurting.
Maybe because I didn't eat gross pizza or some such prior to falling asleep?
In other news, I seem to have lost weight. Which is a good thing right?
Yeah except my second favorite pair of jeans aren't fitting right anymore. This would be tolerable but for the fact that my absolute favorite pair have holes in the upper thigh, and can't really be worn out except when I'm going for that kind of look.
Can I hit Ikea and Yorkdale in one day and not become a zombie? Hmm..
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